Tanjung Pinang!!!

This was the email I sent to some of you guys earlier. More of my comments below:

Hi everybody,

I’m back from my Tanjung Pinang Mission trip!!! Haha, please bear with this long email as I would love to share my experiences with you… (I tend to write a lot when it comes to stuff that I like haha)

The first day - Friday (16 Dec) – we reached there close to lunch time… settled down and we joined the boys for their lunch. The place is called ‘Asrama Putra’. They have a girl’s home too on the other side of the road called ‘Asrama Puteri’. While we were waiting for lunch we tried talking with some of the boys and were surprised to find out that they like soccer clubs as well… it was a good thing that one of the boys from Singapore knew how to speak Malay… so it kinda broke the ice to know that they also like clubs such as Liverpool, Chelsea, Man U hehe….

Lunch was then served… it came in huge tubs… the kind of tubs that you sometimes store water in or wash clothes… it was rice, a small fish (one piece only – smaller than a normal ikan selar), and veggie which was long beans cooked in some sort of sambal. They served us first – their plates were those canteen type plates but very old and dirty looking… we ate our food on paper plates and had paper cups of boiled water that was yellow… it tasted like our normal tap water you just have to look the other side when you drink coz of the colour! Hahaa

The table I was sitting at was with some of the younger boys… roughly around 9-12 years old… and we tried making small talk with them, they were pretty shy though. We heard that they were only allowed to take 1 serving of fish as there was not enough to go around and to take a second helping, others would want as well and there would be no end to it. Not too sure what they do to the left overs though… maybe they use it to make fried rice which is what we have for breakfast in the morning – they fry the left over rice. Heard they eat 15kg of rice a day!

After lunch, we sorta broke up into groups with some of the boys showing us around their place… me and my friend had 2 tour guides… a Nicholas (about 15 years) and Agung (about 10-12 years). They were pretty good… luckily I knew a bit of simple Malay as well, it helped… they showed us their dorm, their school, their library (they had Harry Potter as well in Bahasa Indonesia which Nicholas had read as well – all 4 or is it 5 books hehe) their sports area … they wrote my name in the Malay characters that looked something like Arabic, which I also took a photo of, but I lost my camera… *sigh*

After that was a bit of free time, so we used the time to wrap presents for them, which basically was bookmarks, pens, collar pins (Pokemon etc) and keychains (Winnie the Pooh hehe)… These were for both the boys and the girls which one of the parents had bought earlier. After that they went to play basketball and soccer with them.. some of us girls were tired so we went to take a nap – later we watched them play for a while – some of our boys joined them – and their feedback was the boys of the home were really good players – and they were really nice as well, as in our Singapore boys not very good, but they passed the ball to us continuously – and if one of them accidentally took the ball instead of letting the Singaporeans get it, they would kena scolded haha….
After the wash up, it was dinner – and dinner consisted of rice again, veggies (cabbage or something) and a hard boiled egg with sambal. Once again, only 1 hard boiled egg was allowed for them…. But the food was actually quite tasty, even though it was so simple and so little.

After dinner, we gathered in one of their rooms where we all introduced ourselves. It was very cute to see the boys introducing themselves as the caretaker of the place made them stand in a row – going by grades – and getting them to introduce themselves saying ‘my name is…’ ‘I am – years old’ ‘I like…’. The boy on the left was supposed to introduce his partner on the right and they keep forgetting to say ‘His name is…’ They said ‘My name is…’ it was really funny hehe… most of them love soccer and basketball… with only 1 liking billard, another badminton, and another internet. Their ages range from 9 to 19. It was our turn to introduce ourselves and after that we sung 2 English Christian songs and joined them for their prayers in their chapel, then it was time to sleep.

The next day – Saturday – for breakfast it was fried rice… and tea – their tea was simply delicious, my friend drank 4 cups! Haha…another of my friend was afraid to drink it though as it looked as though there was black sand in it haha…. after that we made a trip to the market as some of the ladies wanted to cook for them… the market is kinda like ours…just more things cluttered together and more grimy… I actually took a pic but then got scared coz of the flash as the people there started looking at me and chatting away… yikes hahaa…me and my friend bought some keropok to fry for them. The other ladies bought beef, eggs, chicken wings, potatoes… they wanted to cook spaghetti, beef, omelette and mashed potatoes for the boys.

Back to the home and most of us were preparing the food to be cooked… the home has actually 40 over boys so there was a lot of onions to peel, veggies to prepare etc…lunch was beef, rice, egg and kangkong… cooked by 2 of the ladies that came from Singapore.. after that, me and my friends decided to fry the keropok for them so that we could rest and bathe after that. During this time, the rest went to see the girls home.

After that it was more preparation – some of us preparing for the Christmas item for that night, some of us preparing for the mashed potatoes. The boys were actually having a good time singing and playing some of the guitars we brought over – and later we realised that they were actually practising for the item that they were performing for us. We actually had a shock as when we went to the dining area to prepare cucumbers for the potatoes we saw our keropoks sealed in small little pack (3 in a pack) placed into a very nice cake box and inside there was rice, napkins.. it looked very grand but we were shocked as we had fried the keropok for them, not to give away. We asked them and they said it was for some guests that they were having later and that they had enough keropok left for them but we were doubtful.

After that we practise a bit for our item which was us acting out the Christmas nativity scene and singing carols… and then it was time for mass. After mass we gathered in the hall – where they showed a slide show of the boys and the girls and it was really funny coz they added captions to the pics – stuff like – ‘we are a family of monkeys’ and ‘look at me I can fly’ that sorta thing haha… then it was dinner… and we were shocked… coz dinner was the food that was packed in the cake boxes earlier! So that was actually for us! How sweet of them! Somemore I think those cake boxes were pretty expensive…. The rest of them ate their food in brown paper. Dinner this time was much better – rice, chicken wing, a packet of keropok, a packet of macaroni, a packet of macaroni filling, a small slice of yellow watermelon, and later we went around serving them with the mashed potatoes and cucumber. Was really happy that they had this treat – later learnt that they never ate macaroni before, and they only eat meat once a week if they are lucky.

Then it was time for the show – 2 of the girls were hosts – the girls started off singing for us in groups – and even sung for us an English song – ‘My all in all’. Some of them were good with the guitar so they were singing songs and playing the guitar… and then afterwards it was the fun part. There are actually 2 French guys there who are their teachers and they put an act for the kids – where one of them sat behind the other and was the other’s hands – it was pretty funny seeing the guy shave, read newspapers, brush teeth, bathe (throw water) all done by the guy sitting behind him – hands.

Then some of the boys from the home went to perform for us – as one of the French guys knows some circus tricks, the boys, who learnt it from him, performed those tricks for us – juggling balls, doing a yoyo sorta game, and doing a stick sorta game. They even had a band! But you know what – their band – consisting of drums, keyboard, guitars – were all cardboard and home made! They played a song in the background and pretended they were a rock band…complete with the solo electric guitar playing and the solo singing!!! It was really cool!!! I hope my friend took pics of this so that I can show you guys.

Then it was time to learn their Indonesian dance, which was pretty cool… and then they had disco!!! Yup, its just like our disco with the flashing lights, the jamming songs – only thing is there was no drinks haha… it was really fun dancing with them… its like everybody was pulling us to dance and making us feel comfortable, dancing together with us… the only thing was it was so hot after that haha…

Oh yah, we also used rainwater to bathe. Rainwater is their only source of water that they use to drink, bathe, cook, and its also full of larvae! Haha… but for drinking they will boil the water before that. My friend also said she saw worms in the rice and water but it was cooked so its ok. Lots of mosquitoes there as well, but the people there are really immune and strong. The boys are so skinny – coz they eat rice mainly – but can see that they are very strong and sinewy. – guess coz of the sports that they like to play. None of them wear specs… too poor I guess… and very few had pimples haha… one of us actually commented that to them on the first night, to which they said they eat a lot of vegetables that’s why. Oh, they also have a punching bag there hahaa…which one of the teachers told us that they like to fight, but to keep them from fighting outside they have the bag.

After the disco, we presented them with our presents – which they opened immediately – one of them asked us to sign on their bookmark – and afterwards the rest followed – we were like overnight stars like that – everyone getting our signatures – and counting the number of signatures they had so that they would not miss any of us out hahah…it was really very fun.

The next day and last day – Sunday – it was beach time – it was about an hour’s ride to the beach – (the home is about 5km from the ferry terminal)… and the beach was really beautiful with stronger currents and a little small lagoon in one corner (looked like a baby pool). The boys and the girls were really having a lot of fun…they can do gymnastics and (breakdance even the night before) and all…. and for those of us who went down to the water area, they pulled us in making sure we got wet haha… I got a bit scared coz I couldn’t swim so I went out of the water … but played with them volleyball for a short while… which I wasn’t very good either (not sporty) but they were really nice, teaching me how to play and throwing me the ball and encouraging me when I hit it hahaha…

Then a few of us learnt how to play some of the circus games that they like to play – the yoyo… and the stick game which I really like…. You hold a long stick in between too sticks and move that middle sticks to and fro building up momentum until it is lifted off the ground – it was really fun I took pics of the boys playing that and really hope I can show you guys. We could see they really enjoyed showing us how to play the games and were happy when we could master it.

After that and lunch – which was packets of rice, a small piece of chicken and a small portion of veggies (cabbage)… we were just taking lots of photos… group photos and individual pics with them…they also had a camera – think it was one of the French’s guys camera – and they were just taking pics and videos of us as well. Then it was time to go back already to prepare to leave.

I spoke to one of the boys – Rudi I think - he mentioned he would love to come to Singapore but has no money and asked us to come and visit us again, saying that they really enjoyed our company. About 14 of us went… 7 guys, 7 girls, about 6 of us 20 years old and below. Haha, I have the email of one of the teachers there and hope to correspond with them and follow up with them soon.

Haha, all in all it was really a fruitful trip. I would definitely love to go back again there if it is possible, and I just want to thank you guys for your support, donations, prayers and listening ears. God bless!


Personally, the trip was fantastic. Made lots of new friends. Boys and girls aside, made friends with Diana (hiccup laugher), her brother Calvin and Felicia. Talked and bonded more with Kemmy and Angeline. Haha, yesterday we went to Harbourfront for dinner and it was so fun… even Felicia said that wow, our youth group is so fun… she can just listen to us talk and laugh or if she doesn’t wanna listen she can just shut off… yah man… and we were separated as well… the older bunch… Francis, Fr. D, Aunty Loo, Dennis all went to Telok Blangah to makan. I wanted to go with them at first coz of the whole group thingy, but I was so glad I didn’t and so happy that Calvin and Diana joined us as well. It’s more fun. Younger people more fun!!! I think I will forever be 18 hahaha…. I’m so young at heart anyway kekeke.

I wonder and I’m going to ask God. Is there a reason why I did not get the social work thingy. Am I meant to do Mission Work instead. In fact Kemmy told me jus before we went off that she felt I was more towards Mission Work. I didn’t believe her as I thought all along God wanted me to do social work. Coz it was nearer to home with friends and family anyway. But now I’m thinking, maybe he gave me a chance to experience both and then I could see which one I was more to… I dunno… I must quickly pray and ask him to show me the way and give me the chance. I know Mission Work I wouldn’t like the building and the digging part… but if it is to take care of them such as the poor and the sick, or cook for them or teach them I would be so happy. And more towards the youth and the kids… not really the elderly. Lets see how, I really hope I will be able to do this. Yup. So I’m giving myself another 6 more months with STYG unless God says otherwise. And I hope that I will still be able to do more stuff but will youth as well, elsewhere.

I find that I would be able to live in those conditions. Indonesia that is. My stomach can take the food and my skin is not sensitive. Okie, so I wouldn’t want pimples and become darker but I don’t mind seriously if I were to live there. All I have to do is brush up on my Malay and learn swimming and be more sporty. Oh and I wonder about other places such as Africa. Or which other places do people go to to do Mission Work. In fact I’m seriously thinking of joining Mother Teresa’s Little Sisters of the poor. But provided that is my calling. I really have to pray and I really hope I can do this. Haha, right now I feel even more strongly about this than about social work. And over the past 3 days, I didn’t really miss Singapore to tell you the truth. I don’t know if its because its such a short time, but I think I can always make new friends there, and I will be able to survive. I really don’t know… I pray and hope the opening will be made for me and that this is what God really wants for me.

My time in Tanjung Pinang has also opened my eyes and made me appreciate the things I have more. It’s like in Tanjung Pinang, there’s only 3 meals a day. And one dish would definitely be veggie. Another if you are lucky, fish. Over here with rice we usually eat 3 dishes. And we snack a lot in between. It has really made me more conscious about how much food we eat compared to them. And conscious about spending money and buying expensive things. One thing about me is that I like to eat good food and shop for clothes, etc. Look at them, they really eat and live simply. And they are so happy and contented!

My New year’s resolution: - Learn swimming – Brush up on my Malay – try to eat and buy things that I need, not I want - hehehe

Unashamed Love

My dear friends, let me ask you a question… are you ashamed of Jesus. You know its funny how we are so afraid to proclaim our love for God to others unless we are together with our fellow Christians.

It is for this aspect that I admire the Christians. True, sometimes they preach and they evangelise so much that it is a turn off and it becomes stale – to the extend that you are wondering whether they really want you to know about God, or simply to get you to join their denomination. But the admirable quality is that they are not afraid to do it, and they do not give up.

I am ashamed at myself sometimes. In the taxi, when I’m late for work, and I want to say my morning prayers, I would check to see if the driver is looking before making the sign of the cross. Or even at meal times. I very much want to tell my non Christian friends or ‘non-believers’ as what the Christians call it that sometimes the reason why I’m so happy in the office and sometimes or grin to myself or why certain things happen is because of God. But I often refrain myself coz I don’t think they would understand, or I would be labelled as being ‘holy’ or that they would scorn me and their impression of me would change.

Like the other day I was telling my good friend who came back from Aussie that I wanted to do social work. She was shocked truly shocked and all I could say was that I came to that conclusion after some serious evaluation. I couldn’t and wouldn’t tell her that it was actually my calling from God. Especially after she was shocked and said it was so unlike me. Even to my fellow Catholics. I refrain from telling them that it was God himself who told me that it was my calling. Why I ask myself. I am afraid that they won’t believe that God would talk to me? But when I look back it seems that I am doubting that God talked to me himself – for the very reason that I am holding it back. :(

This week I decided to tell my colleagues that I would be going on a mission trip to Tanjung Pinang. My close friends in the office know about it anyway. But I wanted to ask for donations for the homes there. Haha, on one hand, it was so easy telling some about the trip but difficult in collecting donations. On the other hand, it was so difficult telling others about the trip but kinda generous in donations. Oh well. I was telling myself its not for me anyway.

But the more I think of it, the more it made me think about evangelising in general and I am so disappointed with myself and I question myself why is there a need to hold back this joy and this love that the Lord gives. Why are you ashamed to proclaim it. Why are you ashamed of giving thanks to your God for food. Why are you ashamed in giving thanks to God for the things He has done for you even amongst your fellow brothers and sisters in Christ sometimes. Something to think about and change.

If I could choose between the world and God, I would choose God. But you have to live in the world and put God right on top. Nobody said it would be easy. If it was, we wouldn’t be here already.

Work

Heya!!!
It’s been a while since I wrote. Super busy. And no internet to post hahaa… so by the time u read this would be ions away.

I was very impressed by someone who helped me yesterday. Truly impressed, was full of admiration and respect for this particular person. I didn’t talk much to this person until yesterday, neither did I thought this person was free to help. It was by a stroke of luck that I recalled her telling someone else before on Mission Sunday that if she knew we needed help and started early she would have come earlier. So I decided to try my luck. Person said most probably could, and later actually came down. Wanna know who this person is. It’s Felicia!! :) Yupyup.

Truly amazing. We were really short handed yesterday. We planned to do the crib yesterday. Or rather, I came up with the date :P Shawn was at Novena. Eugene was in Malaysia. Annette getting guitar and James and Ralph watching movie. Rest all couldn’t help. I was really desperate. Perhaps Sun was a bad day to do it.

It really made me evaluate my role in the youth. If I can’t motivate people to help why should I even carry on. Anyway Jock said to still come down anyway. He said we needed at least 4 people. And so far, it was just Ivan and me. Yikety yikes. Felicia confirmed later. I think I’m really blessed. That God let it turn out the way it did. Jock stayed only for less than an hour and the next hour was me, Ivan and Fer. We had a great time. At least, I know I did!!! Hahahaaaaa it was so fun. Me & Fer holding the structure and Ivan screwing it in. (afraid that he would drill his fingers in instead). Arranging the figurines whichever way we wanted to. Styling the ‘hay hair’ on one of them. Afro style. Pouring Heaven & Earth Jasmine green tea from a packet form into a bottle. Like pee-ing like that. Yeah I know, so disgusting!!! But everything was so fun haha. I’m a teenager at heart really lah. I was really touched. And these people could really work. Really really doing things. And taking the initiative as well. I really have the utmost respect and admiration for these people.

There are so many types of people. Those that can lead. Those that can organise. Those that command. Those that follow. Those that can do work. Those that can just talk.

It’s amazing how just one thing that a person does or say could just either open your eyes in seeing them. Both positive and negative.
For one person, it has changed my opinion coz I always thought very highly of them. Not that I thought any less highly of them after the incident, but now I know that I was too blinded by my ‘impression’ of them haha.
For the other person, there wasn’t really much to think about since I didn’t really communicate with the person. But after the incident, I now know I can count on them and I regard them on a high level. Yup amazing right. I think ‘amazing’ is becoming my favourite choice of word nowdays hahaha.

Later it was just Ivan & me doing the tree. I almost had a shock coz we were finishing the tree when some people said that it was not the right one. Luckily after mass Fr. Arro said it was okay. Can you imagine how heavy the leaves were and if we had to dismantle the tree again and bring it back to the store room. Not to mention I knocked my head tree times at the entrance and lost most of my brain cells hahaha. Yah, was pretty drained by the end of yesterday.

I also had a dream about somebody yesterday. Dreamt that I was telling a particular friend of mine off. Yeah. I guess coz I was fed up of this person. Seemed so self righteous and all that it was time I put this friend of mine in place. In my dream that is. Hahaha. Well, this friend looked so sad and looked like about to cry and was about to say something when I woke up!!! Arrgghhh how frustrating was that right. I was waiting to see what they would say hahahahaa…. Oh well, its just a dream :)
Oh, and last Sat during our prayers, it happened again… I was thinking of the song “Thank You”… my Beloved King… to you I sing… Hallelujah song… and afterwards, it was sung. Amazing. Oh, and you know what the meaning of the word ‘alleluia’ and ‘hallelujah’ means!!! It means glory and praise to GOD!!!! Amazing right!!! Always I just sing it but now that I know the meaning it puts so much more fervour into the song.

Social Work

Hi.
I’m pretty subdued today. What a week it has been. First of all, I had been sick for almost the entire week. It was terrible. Running nose, flu, blocked nose, cannot breathe properly, sore throat, cough, all very painful. Sigh.

I just want to say that I don’t like that guy anymore. Its funny how a certain incident or something can happen to open you eyes and then you see that that person was not whom you thought he was at all. I’m not sad, rather I’m happy. My prayers for me to get over it has been answered. I just leave my love life into God’s hands and I know He will find the right person for me.

Secondly, I finally went for the trial for the social work. Yep. Thursday and Friday. Thursday I started off in the morning at KK Hospital, Class C ward. To talk to the mums who just gave birth about the Healthy Start Programme. Haha, it was okay… I saw how the girl I was attached too did it… which didn’t really help much since she talked to some of them the day before so it was easier. Some of them were quite friendly, but some were hesitant. One of them asked me whether the towel (with the hotline number printed on it) was free or whether she had to pay.

I spent a bit of time talking to the girl I was attached with during lunch. It seems she has a degree from NUS!! She’s one of the only ones though who has qualifications. She said that it is one of the only organisations that accept people who don’t have the qualifications. She’s 24. Anyway, after lunch, it was home visits. Yes, a huge part of what they do is to visit the families at their homes. The people were not in at the homes we visited together, but she told me to go to 3 homes on my own later. My mom had a shocked when I told her this. She said what if they were to beat me up. I was a bit afraid too, not of being beaten up, but because I had no idea what to ask them!!! It’s like they were just referring me a case to follow up but with not much of information. Anyway for the first 2 houses I went, no one was in. The 3rd one, the guy was in, and he was quite happy and friendly that I visited. He was actually waiting for them to get back to him, which made me think, were they sitting on it. He’s 32 years old and divorced, and has to support his other family. His wife is 18. He earns $700 a month, and they have a 9 month old baby. Anyway, I was dead tired coz I was walking the whole day. From Tiong, we walked to a house in Lengkok Bahru. Then we walked to office at Bukit Merah View. Then I walked to a house at Taman Ho Swee. Then I took bus to Crescent and walked to find Blk 4 and 16. Haha.

The next day, Friday, was supposed to meet the Assistant Director in the office. We went to a house that was referred to us by the MP (the guy approached her for assistance) and she told me to take over and I had to do the talking. Ok, so I asked all the info I could and then after that I was at a loss so I handed it over to her. Which was good, coz then I learnt that were we come in, is only to provide the subsidy. She sat down with me after that and explained it to me. Finally haha… that I was clear about it. Then after lunch, I went again house visiting with another girl. We went to one house and she started talking away in Malay to the family. Then the next house, she told me to do the talking but as soon as she entered, she monopolised the whole conversation, as she met the ‘client’ before. I told her so, but she said I could have at least played with the kids. Haha, I knew that was it… she’s gonna give me a bad report. She also said that if I’m in mass comm., I should be very vocal. Yeah yeah. Anyway, there was one more house to go to on my own which I did. After that it was evaluation time, but I had to wait for a bit. So the AD sat me down and told me she talked to the 2 girls who were attached to me.. and she said they felt I was a bit ‘soft’ and that I wouldn’t be able to take the pressure and stress. They needed someone ‘gung ho’ haha... and who would just react as she was saying that sometimes they receive suicide calls and you’re supposed to just react and not think. Haha, ok, she has a point. I’m a bit laidback. But somehow I couldn’t help but feel that it’s also because I didn’t speak to the family that I went to with that gal coz she was talking the whole time. Anyway, she said she was unsure, and would get back to me, latest by Monday. I was in a dilemma then. Do I want it. I was thinking God would only give it to me if I want it. I wanted to sit down and talk to Him. But it was difficult to coz I was so sick by then. I didn’t have a chance tho. Around 8pm already she smsed me saying that they could not offer me the position. Oh well. I was disappointed believe me. Disappointed that I would still be stuck at my current job!!! That was the main one. Other than that, I mean, whatever happened happened. It was not the end of the world. I only was disappointed as I would not have any other openings elsewhere because this was one of the few organisations that accepted people with no related qualifications. Nevertheless I truly believe that my calling is social work. After all, how did I come to the deduction after discerning and praying that it was social work? Couldn’t been the devil right. And also, God was the one that gave me the opportunity to experience the 2 days with them. Coz I did not go all out to look for it anyway. So I truly believe that He will provide me the opportunity again. Perhaps now is to prep myself up… to experience how it is like, to finish up my unfinished business… and He will provide the way for me. Amen.
P.S. I just wanted to say that for last week prayers, something amazing happened again. It was only 4 of us – Kem, Dennis, Jock and me. We started off with free praise. And somehow the song ‘Blessed’ kept coming into my mind. And then later, as we were about to close, Dennis said to sing the song ‘Blessed’. Was that the Holy Spirit or what!!! Hehe. Oh yah and I will be leading again this Friday. I hope to have some quiet time, and I hope that He gives a message for the youth. I think they will be having prayers tonight as well. Jock’s bdae!! Unfortunately, I won’t be able to join them. Had planned for more than a month to go out with my colleagues. Oh well, sometimes you gotta give, sometimes you gotta take.